


Understanding Deuality

by THEY_GRIN_VICIOUSLY



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: BDSM, Caleb is the Dominant Bottom, Dominant Bottom, I will die on this bridge, It starts out as just sex., M/M, Mention of Avantica, Mention of Bondage, PWP, Past Relationship(s), Platonic BDSM, This is during episode 56, You know when Caleb and Fjord slept in the same fucking bed!!!, my tagging system sucks I'm sorry, submissive top
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-12 23:40:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18457013
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/THEY_GRIN_VICIOUSLY/pseuds/THEY_GRIN_VICIOUSLY
Summary: Fjord feels a little uncomfortable about how he treated Caleb in the Bright Queens Palace. He decides to apologize to him, and during their conversation, lets something unexpected slip. Caleb can't help but want to learn more.





	Understanding Deuality

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, I don't have anything to say about this story other than I have a strong head-cannon that Caleb is a very commanding guy in a certain way. Hopefully, you like it.

He was nervous. Fjord really didn’t think that his and Jester’s performance would be taken seriously, but it had put Beau in a horrible mood and Caleb just went straight up to the bedrooms once they got to the inn and finished eating, not talking that much. He had first went to Beau and apologized and Beau had glared at him for a few moments then her hard eyes, softened its a bit.

“Yeah, just don’t fucking do that shit again, got it?” She had said, unfolding her arms and scratching the back of her head. He had nodded apologized again and headed up to Caleb and his room and now he was staring at the door, his hand gently caressing the door handle and he chewed on his lip. Apologizing wasn’t hard really. He was always a polite and corgal man if not a little sarcastic and self-depreciating, but for some reason this was making his heart race a little bit.

As he pushed threw the door, he saw Caleb sitting on the bed… the only bed… fuck only one bed? He had his eyes closed as he lazily ran his hands over Frumpkin who was purring softly, the only noise in the room. However, when the door opened the red-headed wizard slowly raised his head and opened his eyes. Fjord let out a shaker sigh and closed the door behind him. Why is he so nervous? Caleb is the least intimidating person in their group. Hell, he had apologized to Beau so easily and her demeanor always screams ‘I will fuck you up the moment you piss me off’. And here is this dirty wizard sitting quietly in a room, blinking up at him tiredly clutching his cat, intimidating the shit out him. 

The silence between them stretched uncomfortably as they stared at each other and Caleb shifted off of the bed and stretched.

“I was waiting for you. I’m going to set up our alarm.” As he spoke he pulled out a wire from his pocket and started making his way around the room. Fjord nodded, moving out of his way toward the bed and sitting on the other side, and slowly started unbuckling his armor. His heart was still thudding against his rib cage loudly. He wondered if Caleb could here it?

“So, uh crazy day right?” Fjord kicked himself for the lame start but, Caleb responded casually and unconcerned.

“Yeah, yeah…” He finished running the wire around the room nodded and began pushing his coat of onto floor. “I actually wanted to talk to you, Fjord.” The half orc blinked up at him.

“Oh?” 

“Ja, I wanted to say I’m sorry for uh, taking control of situation. It really wasn’t my intention… I wanted everyone… safe.” Fjord took a moment to think. He supposed Caleb did take control, but it all worked out. Their not in jail and apparently heroes of the Dynasty… That being said the decision was big and it did mean losing something extremely valuable to there team.

“No need to apologize.” He murmured. “It was someth’en that happened in the moment. We’re after the same thing. The safety and health of our little group.” Caleb nodded, walking back to the bed and sat down with a exhaling softly. Frumpkin let out a meow, jumping back in his lap. “I actually wanted to apologize to you. I wasn’t concerned with the same thing.” Caleb gave him a curious look, scratching his chin. “I-Uhm I don’t believe I was looking after you when I made you shine my shoes. I was kinda caught up in the moment and I apologize for that.” Fjord looked at Caleb to see other man’s expression unchanging. Not concerned, not angry just looking up at him with a blankly expression. 

“There is no need to apologize for that.” He said with a shrug. “You were playing a part. A tale we constructed for the safety of the team. You were not suppose to treat a slave with dignity.”

“I know. I get that.” Fjord scratched the back of his head nervously, turning away slightly from the wizard. “But Beau was not happy with it and-“

“-and I’m a different person that Beauregard.” Caleb said, cutting across Fjord. “I am fine with what you did. There may be more situations where I or you will have to pretend to be something we are not. It is what it is.”

“I see.” 

“So, don’t feel bad about it.”

“Yeah…” Fjord couldn’t help but let out a relieved sigh and lean back onto the soft pillows of the bed, his eyes closed. “Like think’n about it, it’s really not my thing. I mean especially that.”

“How do you mean?”

“I would rather listen and do, ya know?” 

“Listening can be fun. It can produce good results. Team input is always good.” Caleb says casually, stroking his cat once more. But Fjord wasn’t really listening him. His mind was flashing back to the sea and Avantika. His time there he had learned things about himself that he really hadn’t explored or thought of. When he was with her, the dominance and confidence she displayed over him was exciting. The way she had pushed him down had really got his blood pumping and he felt alive. Even though it was an experience playing a “owner” in that situation, he was pretty sure that it wasn’t his thing.

“Uh… Fjord?” Caleb’s voice jumped Fjord out of his day dreaming and he turned to see Caleb looking at him with something he could describe as awkward surprise.

“Hm? What?” When Caleb didn’t respond, Fjord sat up a little in the bed, causing it to shift slightly. “What’s up?”

“Offhandedly admitting that a past lover dominated you is a level of friendship I wasn’t aware we had.”  
“Oh…” Fjord sat up fully now, his face flushing. “O-oh…” His voice got a little louder from the rising embarrassment creeping up his neck. He couldn’t believe he had said that out loud. He didn’t remember even saying anything. He must have been so deep in his head that he wasn’t even aware he was talking. “I… I-uh wasn’t aware was talking… you didn’t need to know that.” Caleb’s awkward look changes slowly into a shrewd smile at Fjord’s complete loss of composure.

“Wowie wowie, that’s quite a bit kinky. I didn’t think you where the type.” 

“Uhm… yeah… goodnight.” Now completely flustered, Fjord went under the covers. However, Caleb leaned over and gently peeled the covers down. 

“Don’t be so shy, Fjord. It’s already out in the open. There is nothing wrong with liking to be dominated.” He said, Fjord couldn’t help but notice the wizard’s voice sounded a lot lighter than normal. He felt his hand pat him on the head and he shivered a little bit. “Nothing to be ashamed of. I won’t be telling anyone. That’s your own business and I’m glad you shared it with me.” Fjord could stilling feel his heart slamming against his rib cage, but he turned his head slightly against the pillow.

“Would it help you, if you knew something about me?” Fjord couldn’t help but turn over, his heart still racing and his ear twitching curiously.

“You don’t have to…” He said automatically, his voice a low murmured, but Caleb shook his head, his red shaggy shaking back and forth. He scratched his stubbled chin looking up at the ceiling.

“I actually liked the harness.” He admitted, looking down at Fjord. Caleb’s blue eyes were sparklingly with a playful mischievous light, something that Fjord had never seen before. Normally, he looked so stressed out or exhausted. But looking at this Caleb, talking about how he actually got something from shittly assembled straps made Fjord’s heart flutter.

“Really?”

“ _Ja._ I was a little disappointed when you cut them off.”

“So, you like being dominated too?” Fjord asked curiously. Caleb tilted his head to side as he looked down at the half-orc.

“I wouldn’t say that… I just like the straps against my body. It’s a form of support. I liked that they were tight on me.” Fjord raised an eyebrow, propping his head up on his hand. This conversation had taken a strange turn, but talking about this type of stuff was a little cathartic. Especially after the day they had it seemed nice to just talk about small stuff. After hesitating a bit, he looked down at the bed and spoke quietly.

“I mean, I think I really enjoy be’en dominated like I do because it stops me from thinking. I like giving someone else the reins, ya know? I feel like I’m always strategiz’en and it helps to take a break off of that.” Caleb scratches his chin, as if thinking then leans down.

“Have you had any other experiences?” Fjord shook his head. 

“Avantika the only one…” _In fact she was my only experience, period._ He finishes in his head. He really hadn’t been able to be with anyone in that capacity before her. Maybe because of his awkwardness on the subject or maybe because he had other things on his mind. “Have you ever worn a harness other than that one?”

“ _Ja_ , a couple times when I was younger.” He plucked the shirt he wore as he spoke, his eyes glazing over slightly. “Sometimes, I wore it under my robes if I was feeling bold. I liked the red marks they left on my skin too. I use to be able to wear it for hours.” Slowly his hands traced his collar bone and slowly ran down his chest, probably where the last harness had been squeezing him. Fjord sat up slowly and gazed at the distant look on Caleb’s face. Maybe he was recounting his time at the academy. Fjord himself imagined a younger Caleb with black straps under his clothes and he couldn't help but lick his lips with excitement at the thought. Then a wave of guilt rushed into his stomach. He really shouldn't be thinking about his friend like that. This was something he commonly had to shake out of his head. Fjord was didn’t necessarily have sex on his mind all the time, but he was a man and had his needs. Even before Avantica, he had always eyed Caleb whenever he could look without anyone noticing. He would often have to push certain explicit thoughts out of his head of a certain wizard. Maybe, that’s why he had been nervous to talk to Caleb? Maybe him telling Caleb to shine his shoes was him trying to act out his desires? He tried to shake the image out of his head and there was a moment of silence before Caleb’s eyes slid to Fjord face again a curious look in his eyes. “Fjord.”

“Hmhm?”

“Do you always associate harness with submission?” 

“Uhm…” That was an interesting and complicated question. He blinked up at Caleb, chewing on his lip. Caleb simply stared down at him. However, he didn’t know if he was imagining it but he felt that Caleb’s voice had changed and those blue eyes that were earlier so distant became sharper. He stuttered a little bit on his words as he tried to formulate a proper response. “N-not particularly… I reckon one could be pretty dominating with harness…” Caleb nodded slowly, small smile creeping up on his face that made Fjord shiver. He became acutely aware how the wizard loomed over him ever so slightly.

“I agree. Sometimes, I found, you can show something like authority with a harness.” As he speaks Fjord notices Frumpkin stretch from his position and rubs up against Caleb, who runs his fingers against the cat’s orange body. Fjord can’t help but watch his fingers gently intertwine with the cat’s fur. It was almost hypnotising. What was happening? Why was he feeling suddenly like he did with Avantica. This was just a conversation, right? Intimate, yes… but just a conversation…

“When you where with Avantica, what brought you to the conclusion that you wanted her to take control?” The question was asked in such a nonchalant way. Fjord’s mouth fell open slightly, not looking into the wizard's face. His yellow cat like eyes seemingly studying the patterns on the fabric of the cheap blankets, but inside he was panicking. Talking about a past fling in detail, while his friend gazed down at him cooly was...exciting? The other man was calm, almost cold sounding, while he was nervously fidgeting and sweating.

“Well…” He said softly, still not looking up but he was interrupted by Caleb reaching out and lifting his head so yellow eyes met blue. His pupils turned to lines as he surveyed Caleb’s features. He had a small smile playing around his lips and when their eyes met he couldn’t notice Caleb push his tongue between his teeth. “Caleb?”

“Answer the question, Fjord.” He said softly, the lower octave sent another chill down Fjord’s spine. In that moment, something clicked in his head and he let out a low shaky breath, letting the those words roll over him. 

“When she pushed me down, and road me I felt like I was being used. I liked it.” He didn’t recognize his voice really. It was a lot lower than he intended it to be, and slightly raspy. 

“Ah.” Caleb’s thumb ran against the half-orc’s jaw line tracing it slowly then moving to his lips, gently running the tip of his finger against the small tusks that Fjord allowed to grow out. Fjord’s breath had become ragged and his eyes began to dilate, becoming more round. Caleb chuckled. “You liked it?” The low murmur of his voice made Fjord’s body relax. He couldn’t believe he was allowing Caleb to do this, but he he wasn’t thinking quiet right now. He wanted to show his affections, or maybe he needed to? He leaned his head against Caleb’s hand and chewed on his lip. Noticing, Caleb’s smile turned into a smirk. “That’s lewd, Fjord. You’re quiet the pervert.”

“I’m sorry.”

“ _Lüg mich nicht an, Liebchen._ I don’t think you are.” Caleb’s rapid change to Zemnian got Fjord’s mind racing and he felt his crotch throb. He had no idea what he had said but it definitely got him going. He swallowed loudly and shifted his body weight, almost scooting closer to the wizard, his eyes never leaving Caleb’s. 

“Caleb.”

“Yeah?”

“This was very unexpected.” Caleb burst into laughter, causing Fjord’s chest to fill with warm. He didn’t think he ever heard Caleb laugh like that ever before. Honestly, he didn’t even think he heard him laugh ever. The red head let go of his cheek and ran his hand through his hair, still chuckling. 

“I was very into dominance when I was younger as well.” He said. “I use to read lots of interesting books.”

“Well… holy shit.” Fjord pushed himself up, still staring at Caleb, who had stopped stroking his own hair and watched the half-orc through narrowed eyes. Fjord could barely contain the lust building up in his belly. His could feel his dick straining against against his trousers. 

“You look like your about to jump on me.” He said. 

“I would never… your the one in control.” Fjord could hear Caleb exhale with excitement. 

“ _Ja?_ You would let me?” Fjord nodded, his yellow eyes sparkly with excitement.

“Show me that side of ya’, Caleb.”

**Author's Note:**

> So... this is chapter one. There will be a chapter two that will have NSFW stuff... but I'm not sure if I'll continue after that. It just sorta depends. if I do it, this story is gonna be them exploring BDSM and maybe other fetishes. We'll see.


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